Ray Jorden: Celebrity Big Brother Final 2017 (as it happened) #CBB

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By Ray Jorden

Well how incredible has this years Celebrity Big Brother been, love or hate the celebrity housemates they have all played a huge part in making this season one of the best, if not the best series EVER, Big Brother has played his hand so brutally well and as a long time fan of the show since season one, this brand keeps getting better and better, and I cant wait to see what is in store for the Summer Big Brother later this year. 
 
In an emotional roller-coaster of a show we’ve had, tears, tantrums, fights, two faced bitching, laughs, gossip, and two odd balls from planet Jedward, a perfect recipe concocted by the brilliant mind of Big Brother. 


 
So who will win?  
Will Kim’s game plan of being Mrs. Nasty win her the title? 
Has James C got this in the bag? 
Will Jedward be singing (well they call it that) to victory? 
Will Bianca romp home to Jamie and their showmance to win the show? 
Will Coleen finally win the crown she is after? 
Can bitchy Nicola really win? 
 
Here we go!!!!! 
 


So a quick flash back to the previous night where I have made some observations, starting with Bianca, is it me or does she sound like she is continually talking through her nose, not sure about you but I find this very grating and would not be surprised out of the final six, she is to go first. 

So Kim’s definition and terminology for rowing is “nic knocking” who knew!! I have to say that when one half of Jedward was dressing up as Kim, doing an impression of her, he looked way too comfortable in that dress that’s for sure…..camp alert!!!!! 

A final flash back of Coleen doing lap dance, please stop now before I bring my dinner back up, not nice or polite to see, there are some people just not built for this type of dancing, maybe stick to being a couch potato dear! 
 
So as predicted Bianca takes 6th place, she seemed pleased and ready for her exit, pretty sure by seeing Jamie with the rest of his housemates who have previously been evicted, he might have had a little rumble in his boxers, mind you when I saw Calum’s arse before he went in the shower, that certainly got my boxers wagging!!! 

She left the house to plenty of claps, pretty sure that’s not the first time either (read in to that what you will) I am wondering if she can barely see with her eyelashes being so long, but she made it safely down the stairs to Emma ready for her interview. 

She claims that she had a hard time in the house, well B the amount of times you disappeared to the loo with Jamie, we’re pretty sure that’s an understatement right there!!! And please stop saying all the time “but obviously” its totes cra cra!! 

And so we go back to the house to see who is the 5th place winner! 

So Nicola takes 5th place, the look on her face was clearly gutted as I truly believe she though she had this win in the bag and don’t forget your broomstick on the way out, your gonna need that to clean up all the shit you talk!!! 

I have to say that I didn’t take much notice of her interview with Emma, all I hear is the monotone whine for a voice and to watching her keep arranging her sagging tits, is quite off putting when your trying to eat a crumpet or two!! 

STOP EVERYTING!!! Major shocker James C is out and takes 4th place, you played the game very well, always the diplomat, but now its time to head back to the actors retirement home for coco and sleeps. 

It just shows you that this is anyone’s game and always in Big Brother style ever unpredictable, it seems everyone’s fav was not a fav to win after all, I believe that all the old dears in the care homes who might have voted for James C, either went to bed or had fallen asleep in the day room, meaning vital votes were lost. 

On a brighter note James C, your friendship with Coleen was lovely too see and came across as so genuine, we all need a rock in tough situations and that’s life. 
 
So with her filthy carry on film type of humor and gurning faces, the queen of clean Kim is out and takes 3rd place, when Kim looks you in the face I am not sure where her eyes are looking, but that reminds me I need to buy some mackerel #codeye 

Ding Dong the witch is out!! 

She left the house to a fair few boos, but this hard old trout can clearly hold her own and puts on the brave smile as she walks down the stairs, don’t slip there Kim down the steps, pretty sure Big Brother doesn’t want you to break a hip now!! 

I for one will not miss “hello luvie” but I will miss “chicken liver and you’re a bitch” 
 
 
Her interview was very confusing as she clearly wasn’t paying attention and was quite excitable, maybe the way she was fidgeting in the chair her mature tenna lady’s were chaffing a little too much!! 

She calls some of the housemates bullies, well Kim the way you have spoken to certain people in the house also makes you a bully too #touche and in the back ground on the screen you can clearly see the other housemates sticking their fingers up to her, we can tell she was clearly loved in the house!!! 
 
So two housemates left, Coleen and Jedward!! 
 
Jedward romp home to second place, they played the game annoyingly well with their antics, poor Emma was trying to get decent answers from the questions she was asking, but in true Jedward style they are all about themselves, self absorbed, and should probably fuck off back to planet Jedward in all honestly, cannot stand their interview a moment longer. 


 
So this years CBB 2017 winner is Coleen Nolan, as voted by the UK public. I find this all very odd as she was not the most entertaining person in the house, in fact she was a little boring if I am being honest, and its her honesty and transparency is why she has won above anything else, the public like this kind of person and in the end the best person won! 

Well done Coleen!! 


This season of CBB has been so brutally devious and delicious it just goes to show you that no one person can out play the amazing Big Brother!!! 

That’s all from me on CBB 2017 signing off for now and Big thanks to Essex TV who asked me to comment and blog a few times over the season and also thanks to my management Lucky Seven PR
 
   
You can connect with Ray via  
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